This is Family Constellations Malta’s last newsletter in 2017. I hope it has been a good year for you – a year of growth in self-knowledge, self-acceptance and of taking further steps towards your goals and dreams.
I cannot repeat enough that most of the things that at first glance feel challenging, difficult and hard – when we accept them in our lives – in the end turn out to be exactly what was needed to bring us closer to what we are called to do. Looking back at my own life nearly everything that hurt, appeared to be negative and too much, was exactly the next step to something better and more powerful. The key lies – at least as a first step – in acceptance of what is – though this is really hard sometimes.
But what happens, when our first reaction is rejection and we start fighting against the “enemies” and misfortunes? Make a simple exercise: Push your hands forward as if you wanted to reject an enemy. How does this feel? Well, I can see you focussing on what you do not want, with negative thoughts in your head. Your body tightens, your anger rises and you are no longer able to look around you. Your hands are stiff in a posture of rejection, unable to receive any support or solution that might wait out there for you. And most of the time you focus on your hands and are not even able to see what is behind them …………
Now imagine a different scene: There is this frightening, unpleasant thing in front of you. But this time you don’t allow it to take control over you. You just stand there, facing it in a posture of acceptance. You know that in this very moment this is the only thing you can do, because its existence is a fact, a reality. So you open your hands in a gesture of receiving with the inner attitude of “ok, you are there, I am frightened, but since you are there I accept your existence.” With this attitude your body relaxes, you are able to look behind the “enemy” and also to your right and your left. A whole perspective of insights suddenly could be at your disposition and you might understand the meaning of this all, seeing the next steps clear in front of you. And your hands are open to receive whatever solution or answer might want to come to you.
This is my Christmas wish for all of you: I don’t wish for you a life without difficulties, obstacles or blockages. I wish for you that encountering them you will be able to choose the second way, the way of acceptance and awareness, the way of consciously choosing what wants to come into your life, the way of being able to see and receive gifts in what seems too hard to take, the way of a calm and courageous action (not re-action).
May 2018 become a wonderful year for you all of you, may it help you to realise your dreams or at least get a bit closer to them, may you be surrounded by people who love you and support you.
For my family and me 2018 will be a year with some changes. As some of you already know we will leave Malta in summer. But don’t worry, I will be “just around the corner” in a lovely town in the beautiful Southwest of England. And I am planning to visit Malta regularly to continue the Family Constellation Days – of course only if you want me to do it. 😉🙂
There will be 6 more Family Constellation Days and 4 more weekend workshops. The workshops will be focusing on our relationship with father and mother, there will be one more genogram workshop (this time on 2 following Saturdays) and one workshop especially for women to explore the often challenging contradictions of our roles as women, partners and mothers.
I hope these are topics that really meet your life circumstances and I am looking forward to seeing you on the one or other occasion in 2018.
Sending you love and light in the spirit of Christmas